terra
Member Since October 19, 2009
Fleeting Moments (Pt. 2)
by
Avan Snow
Avan Snow
it good, but try to keep the story patched. the way it go, it makes me head hurt trying to follow the sentence, frm one action to another.
At School
by
babalu
babalu
like dude man say. u need to b more wild. jeez, sumding like dis mean u don't have any sexual in ur life or u git off way to easy
Virgin Girl Scout Ripe to Eat
by
Brigit Astar
Brigit Astar
why a repost? there nothing different than the previous story. are you sure you wrote this?
Pleasure at Sundown
by
Guy223
Guy223
don't just use the spell check, but use your own spell check. with proper grammar check, you can make a good story.
My sister was told she was a lousy fuck.
by
davidj
davidj
you need not only to put it in paragraph, but you need to edit your own story...i get the feeling that you don't put effort or this story came from someone else...you also need to put what the character said with some "..." so we know what they said start
Virgin Girl Scout Ripe to Eat
by
g_goyal2000
g_goyal2000
but please don't resubmit the story unless it has been updated.
Stripped Fingered and Fucked
by
Anthony Dennis
Anthony Dennis
if this is another one of your series...you need to properly label these as either chapters or series set...it get confusing about which is first and which is the next...
Good Young Girl Gets Cocked!
by
nuby2
nuby2
you need to learn to space these. it get confusing when i don't know which start and which end.
Alice
by
Hateshiganai
Hateshiganai
i got lost. one things led to another. i didn't even know if they're still kissing or got around to screwing
My Girls Chapter 4
by
unknown1000u2
unknown1000u2
damn good. keep it up. excellant setting the story up. but, u should include more, u no?
if it yours, i hope it to be true.