Goz
Member Since October 19, 2009
Do You Want The Job?
by
Crazykid
5019 days ago
Goz
5491 days ago
-
10
+
too short, no detail
Kim Possble
Err, story might be O.K put bad grammer and puncuation along with using u got you spoils it
The misadventure of homeless marvin
Might be agood story if it was readable, ever hear of paragraphs?
date rape
The storys's not bad but your pucnuation detracts from it. The initial penetration is a bit quick, take your time when you write and read the stroy through a few times checking for context, grammer and puncuation.
Erik, My Dad's Friend
Good job. You have a gift for telling a story. 1 gripe, could you spellcheck your stories before hand? Something silly like bad spelling can detract from a good story.
Becky's Babysitter
Some of the best stuff on the net. Well written, great story and smoking hot!